OB GYN BLUES | Catfish McDaris

Accompanying my wife to the gynecologist,
I found a seat in the waiting room, pregnant
women kept arriving, I tried to doze

I soon came under attack by the
farting contest, one lady sounded like
a Vespa scooter, poppa pop ftttt ftt foo

Another matched her with a braaat
braatt braa bra like a sheep being
strangled by barbed wire

Another sounded like a snoring
wino in his death throes nghaaa
nghaa ngha ngh nggggg aaaa

The last sounded like a 62 Corvair
with no muffler being revved up,
she grabbed her ass & screamed
“Oh goodness” & took off at a run

I laughed & cried so hard, a nurse
was removing the oxygen, as my
wife & her Dr. exited his office
She took one look & said, “Don’t
even ask,” they all gave me
the evil eye.